Like Coming Home

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I want to know about homesickness. I want to know that my handwriting reminds me of my mother. I want to know that chocolate reminds me of Sunday mornings.

I want to know if there will ever be a day when I don’t miss home. I want to know that the answer will always be no.

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I want to know that leaving home is a pit in your stomach. I want to know that leaving anything is hard and that leaving something good is terrible. I want to know how to leave with grace; I want to know how to return with grace. I want to know that I am trying.

I want to know that some days I am homesick and some days I think I must be exactly where I need to be.

I want to know that some days are not the best days but I am still made kinder and bolder because of them. I want to know that everyday my capacity to love and to be kind grows. I want to know that the difference between happiness and anger is a choice. I want to know that this choice is never made for you. I want to know that I am learning.

I want to know that when I asked God to make me happier, he made me more loving instead.
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I want to know that some days it feels bittersweet to change, but that most days it feels like coming home. •

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xo | Megan

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