It’s 2016 and I’m anxious about this year. As much as I don’t want to, I have to admit that. Twelve months and 75% of it is entirely unknown. I know the classes I’ll be taking this semester and that’s about the end of what I know. I’m trying hard to relax about it; if I learned anything from how uptight I was about my future when I was 15, it’s that I shouldn’t be uptight about my future. So, while waiting and wanting for things to happen, I think it’s probably good to be okay with not knowing. Once I get over the fact that I want to know, it gets exciting. I don’t know what will happen because anything could happen.
There’s still that fear though, isn’t there? Knowing that while anything good could happen, anything bad could happen as well. I could have to worst year of my life, right? It’s a possibility, and that’s the part that really gets to me. Of course I want the great things to happen and, ideally, the rest can just stay away. I don’t want the bad days. But…the bad days do have their place. Bad days pull you and stretch you and make you move. We can wish them away, but they must happen.
Thinking about the year ahead of me, I think that’s what I want most: for the things that need to happen to happen. If I need to learn from a year of mostly bad days, I’ll live through it. If I need to grow in a year of mostly good days, I’ll enjoy it and try not to take any of it for granted. Whatever happens, I hope for a year of necessary days. On this, I’m finding peace in an era of unknowns. Days will come and go like the snowflakes you catch on your fingertips, melting before you’ve had a chance to really see them. I’ll do my best to make them the best, but accept them as they come.
It’s 2016 and I’m anxious about this year. But I’m trying to relax about it.
stay dynamite. | Megan